And The Best Shittiest Beer In 2006 Is...

Michelob Ultra. Yes, it makes my heart ache. But apparently not my stomach. I don't want to believe it, but indeed, Michelob Ultra wins as the best shittiest beer in 2006 -- but barely. Click the link below to download the Xcel file with raw data, statistics, and graphs. There were some interesting finds, including one that may help explain how the HELL Michelob Ultra won the contest. Ultra was the beer that gained the most points from Round 1 to Round 2, indicating an increased appreciation for its benign, if not banal flavor. Comments like "water" were written on the scorecards, which was evidently a good thing because "at least it isn't #3 (Round 2)," which was, of course, this year's abysmal loser, Rolling Rock. Rolling Rock was the only beer that was given below-zero scores (which I reinterpreted as the lowest possible score of a "1"), and Rolling Rock was also the only beer that was WORSE than Steele Reserve, an abominable malt liquor. As for the statistics, if you're a stats fiend, you'll find little in this data worthy of your Nature publication. I discovered that people's palates differ enough to make our seemingly large sample size statistically insignificant. To account for this, I compared the cumulative scores of each beer's "taste," "aroma," and "overall" from both Round 1 & 2 to reach a sort of "integral beer score" for each insulting ferment. Importantly (at least for Portlanders), PBR Light came in a close second place as the best shittiest beer for similar "not enough taste to taste bad" reasons; PBR Light was also a beer that gained significant points in Round 2 with, again, comments like "water" on the scorecard. Interestingly, PBR "regular" came in just one burp better than Steele Reserve. ...PDX, don't hurt us! We didn't mean it! ...we just...we didn't know...look, we like the "Light"...really!

Feel free to submit any of your own interesting statistical maneuvering to the AstroSite. I look forward to the responses, further findings in the data, and a repeat of "The Best Shittiest Beer Fest" in the future. Thanks for playing, it was great fun!

Some Findings:
PEOPLE WITH THE SAME FAVORITE BEER BOTH ROUNDS -- Oyer: PBR Light; Erik: Coors Light; Evan: Steele Reserve
PEOPLE WITH THE SAME WORST BEER BOTH ROUNDS -- Jeff: Steele Reserve; Victoria: Steele Reserve and Olympia; Kurt: PBR; Kirsten: Bud Heavy; Erik: PBR; Ian: Natty Ice; Billy: Fosters, Natty Ice, Steele, Rock Lght, Bud HeavY
MOST CONSISTENT BEER BETWEEN ROUNDS -- Kokane, with a total StDev of 2.0 is a consistently "decent" shitty beer
LEAST CONSISTENT BEER BETWEEN ROUNDS -- Keystone Light and Michelob Ultra, with a total StDev of 3.2. This makes Keystone Light the least consistent "decent" shitty beer, and Ultra a least consistent, but "best" shittiest beer
PERSON WITH THE PICKIEST PALATE (lowest total scores given) -- Billy, only 141 total points given
PERSON WITH THE LEAST "REFINED" PALATE (highest total scores given -- Bridget, with a generous 279 total points given
MOST INCONSISTENT DRINKER (highest variance between round 1 & 2 -- Bridget, 10.9 point variance. It sounds like Bridget will drink anything inconsistently!
MOST CONSISTENT DRINKER (lowest variance between round 1 & 2 -- Erik, 1.4 point variance (Billy was 2nd at 2.8)
BEER WITH THE BIGGEST COMEBACK IN ROUND 2 -- Michelob Ultra, possibly after people realize that it was a beer that had no taste, thereby not repulsive
BEER WITH THE BIGGEST LOSS IN ROUND 2 -- Rolling Rock and Miller High Life (cans), possibly after people realize, "oh yeah, I remember that one, and that was about as bad as Round 1 got"
BEER WITH THE MOST COMMENTS WRITTEN ON THE SCORECARD -- Rolling Rock, with comments like "urine" (Katie), "-1" (Christina)

CLICK HERE! for the Results of the Best Shittiest Beer Fest 2006